I found it’s easy to say that the problem lies with the one who is criticising, but that doesn’t lessen the hurt, humiliation and embarrassment it brings – particularly in front of others – when that criticism is being pointed at an individual. If you’re a sensitive soul this will be acutely hurtful and will be hard to deal with, because once those words are in your head it has a habit of staying there!! It can take a lot of hard work to erase what has been said and it is sad that the giver has not realised or is even aware of the damage it has done or is doing.
Criticism hurts, no matter who gives it, and can be unkind and cruel in its nature if it’s negative.
However, constructive criticism is helpful, and if it’s given for the right motive will provide an insight into ourselves and maybe assist us in making a course correction, as it were, in our behaviour towards others and oneself. Examples being – changing our self-talk to one of being more positive, improve our characteristics and behavioural patterns, as well as our interaction with others. So positive criticism is useful to all; it’s like a droplet of water in a lake, each ripple touches the next one, and so on, as it spirals outwards.
As you progress on your spiritual pathway, you will become more aware of how important constructive criticism is, not only to yourself but to others – as stated above – but it’s also essential for you to know that negative criticism of yourself is a waste of time, which I have found, as all it does is reinforce the negative criticism that has been thrust upon you by others.
The way I have dealt with the negative criticism, and still do to a certain extent, is to dwell on the positive aspects of myself as a spiritual being, and look at what I have achieved in my lifetime. Yes, my shortcomings are great indeed and need attention, but overall I intend to progress on my spiritual pathway and learn as much as I am able along the way, very much as you are doing also today.